Sunday, November 09, 2008
You.
I dreamt of you yet again.
I don't know your name, neither do I know how you look like. Heck, I don't even know if you exist! But in my dream, there you were standing right next to me, breathing in the same air. I know I've met you before, somewhere in time. It's weird, i know. And somehow, i kinda get the feeling that you're out there, 'knowing' me too.
Who are you? No. I think the question should be 'Where are you?'
It would be a pity, if I carried on not meeting you in this lifetime. Wouldn't you feel that it would be such a waste of breaths and heartbeats? To have lived a life and not getting to know the person you've been dreaming about? And i'm not talking about daydreams, which are merely bullshit fantasies. I'm talking about full-blown, subconscious-fueled , interpretation-hungry d-r-e-a-m-s. The ones where you wake up from, wondering if you've left a life (albeit a more meaningful one) behind.
You had these hands that would hold onto mine so tightly, it was as if you knew you and I were in a dream and that you'd lose me again if i woke up. I held on too. We were running, through a labyrinth of corridors and alleyways. And you did not, for once, turn and look back. You kept running and I followed.
We were always running in my dreams. What were we running away from? What were we running towards?
We finally came to a place surrounded by people. Your friends, i presumed. We were suddenly not running anymore. Yet, you held on and i clung onto you for dear life. I stood there, drinking in your smell, your presence, while you mingled.
Am I going crazy? Are you only a fragment of my imagination? ('Fragment' would be an understatement at this point.)
My questions beg to be answered.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Finally
I finally saw you. You. For who you are, who you have been all these while.
I can't say that i'm absolutely certain about what you've said. What you've written.
I'm merely guessing.
But if i'm right and if it's true,
then, yes.
I miss you too.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Round-up
Gosh.I didn't expect myself to be writing again. Not this soon. I thought i'd still be having a writer's block (not that i'm much of a writer anyway), but here i am, scribbling away at 2.30 in the morning.
So where do i re-start...
I'm doing good. Not great. Not yet. Or maybe it will never be 'great' while i'm still here in Singapore. I dunno. I feel trapped. Stifled. I need another direction, an escape. But in any other sense, i'm still here, doing my thing.
I'm an editor now. Of Biology/Chemistry books. Not much of a digression from my vocation but it's still not what i'm looking for in the long run. But it'll do for now.
Daddy's gone to Vietnam in search of greener pastures. Jinn's stopping over at Abu Dhabi before making the escape to Melbourne for the next three years (and more). Mom's staying back home, manning an empty nest. And Lynn's here with me. So in a nutshell, my family's all over the place. But at least, we're all still within the confines of Asia.
And I'm still single. Haha...oh...well. Maybe it's for the better, since i now need the time to settle and make amends some things in my own life first before i start messing up somebody else's. But that doesn't mean i'm not looking. I'm definitely looking at some.
...
Oh crap, i lost my train of thought again. Or maybe...i simply have not enough thoughts to sustain this post with. But that's impossible. If i remembered correctly, my thoughts and imagination have been running wild for the past year. Wild, i tell you! Maybe that's why i've been a no-show in writing. I've been too busy trying to round them up.
Maybe next time.
