Monday, February 14, 2005
Farewell Farewell
Before i start ranting about my day, do let me wish all you lovebirds out there a verry Happy Valentine's Day and a Happy Friendship Day to those who are still swinging bachelors and bachelorettes (lucky you!)
Yep, it's 9.15pm right now, on a wonderful valentine's evening with great potential to be magical. Just came back from serenading soppy love songs to a bunch of lovestruck youngsters at a cafe in campus and let me just add that seeing people together just makes me wanna cry.
Why?
I'm spending v-day with the thought that i had just bid my last farewell to chip just yesterday and i might as well never see him again the entire year (or two). He'll be flying off to perth in two day's time and much as i would like, i can't possibly take a day off again to send him off at the airport. I'll make a big boo boo. Or perhaps i'm just being pessimistic and sentimental but heck! one year, no matter how fast others say it'll pass, it's still one freaking looong year! No amount of emails and msn-ings and webcammings are gonna make it any easier. I requested chip not to come to the bus station to send me off this morning, for fear that i might flood Kl. He was kind enough to oblige. But, there's still this achy nagging thought that persists things would have been better if he were to have dropped by for one last hug, one last peck on the forehead, or one last smile, assuring me that everything's gonna be alright.
I hate that i have so little control over my emotions. I hate that whatever i want to do right now is beyond my capacity and logic to do so. I've got so many things to do and so many things to say but so little time. What if i'd never have to chance to ever again? What if things inevitably change? What if two people were to grow apart? What if the term 'out of sight, out of mind' rings true?
I'll miss having good ol' chip around. I'll miss being able to call whenever my inferority complex strikes. I miss hanging out. I'll miss having my bestest friend around. Going back to m'sia will never be the same again.
