Friday, November 05, 2004
Sigh for me
Sometimes you've just gotta trust your instincts.
When you realise that you can't trust the person anymore...don't go near them
When you realise that you can't fix things...don't even try
When you realise that you can't fit right in...be square
I just realised that people here are anal about being perfect but they just can't see for themselves. It's like being equipped with a looking glass and not knowing how to function it. Ironic aint it. Being in this place, i think the only way to not conform is to be as imperfect as possible. Be the kid with the roundest ass and the ugliest haircut. Be the kid with a dress sense that puts Ronald McD to shame. Be the kid with the least amount of stamina, the one who could never run a mile. Be the kid that never seems to get things right. Be the kid who sleeps at 10 at night and wakes up in time for breakfast. This is exactly the place where imagination and creativity suffocate and die.
I'm missing home so much. M'sia is such a CASUAL place to be in. You don't have to strain so hard to let the others notice that you exist. I just had the most absurd eureka moment the other day that i'm sooooooo stuck in this place. Stuck doesn't even begin to describe how it is. More like, strangled. I'm dying each moment here (ok fine, death sounds too harsh. try unconventional-form-of-the-cessation-of-life) The only thing that summons my strength to kick my way out is the mere thought of my homecoming at the end of this month. But thing is, chip will not even be around during the first week that i'll be home. I mean, what the shit? I'll only be home for like, 3 weeks and you're not gonna be around for 1/3 of it? Sigh.
I better get back to my chem report. Heard from some guy he took like 1 whole day to get the thing done. Which ultimately means, i'll not be going to bed again tonight.
